Secrets Revealed | amcais's Blog
Finding information like that about someone you trusted and loved for so long is absolutely heart breaking. He never cared from the beginning and it hurts more than anything that I've ever felt before. How could he not care at all about what he is doing to me??
Every corner has a memory with him to remind me of all of the good times that we shared and they follow me everywhere like lions on the hunt. I keep trying to run away from them, but no matter where I hide I can never get away fom them. I feel so stupid and ashamed because I defended him against everyone and it was all for nothing because he still ended up hurting me.
Moving on from him is going to be so hard, but I know that it has to be done. I know it's dumb, but I just wish he'd say something to me. Anything. None of this makes any sense and I just want him to know just how badly he hurt me and instead he refuses to even be near me now.
I want to tell him how badly he hurt me, that I didn't do anything to be treated like this, to demand an explination, to just ask why I wasn't enough to make him happy. He used me so badly and played my heart like a fiddle until he broke the strings. I was so stupid and I let my heart lead me into the belly of the beast to be consumed.
Why can't he just apologize and give me the explination that I deserve?
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Secrets Revealed, posted February 2nd, 2013
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